CoJ--Rites and Rituals

Rites and Rituals of the Cult of Joss

1) The Compulsive Taping Ritual
CoJ members are not allowed to let a week go by without taping Buffy. Even if it's a rerun. Most of us own a copy of Buffy the movie, and some of us (hi Lizbet!) even paid for a copy of Toy Story because Joss worked on it.
2) The "Eeeeeep!" Rite
Yes, it's a word. It's our favorite word, because it's the easiest to pronounce when there's no air in your lungs (like when you've been holding your breath for an entire hour because you have absolutely no idea what's going to happen next because this is Joss for pete's sake and it's notlikeyoucanGUESSANYTHING...). Ahem.
3) The Gravitating Gravitational Ritual
Minute One of episode: Cult member is ensconced happily in couch, popcorn (or chocolate) held comfortably in one hand.
Minute Fifteen of episode: Cult member is lying flat on couch, gripping popcorn.
Minute Thirty-Nine of episode: Cult member is kneeling on floor, squishing popcorn.
Minute Forty-five through Minute Sixty of eipsode: Cult member is flat on the floor, an inch from the TV, wearing the popcorn.
4) The Naked Chanting Ritual (You think I'm making this up, don't you?)
Field Report from MaryBeth (9/6/98):
The people on the Posting Board (and in this case, I am *not* one of them) have officially gone nuts from rerunitis. I surfed in tonight to see what went on today. All I found was a lot of nudity, goats, and chanting (in an effort, apparently to get joss to come visit -- chanting has worked in the past. This time they felt more, er, less, was necessary.) It frightened me.
Their efforts did result in one Joss drive-by:
"Okay, the chanting I can take. The running around naked... actually, that's okay too."

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